unable to acquire crap within Ohio.
It's unfortunate, I am unable to acquire a single valueless substance during living inside the great state of. No crap in my possession, sadly.
Unfortunately, I can't obtain a single rubbish within Ohio. No waste to be found around here, unluckily. No rubbish to have in the great state of OH.
Unfortunately, I am devoid of the aptitude to have even the smallest speck of waste whilst residing within the borders of the enchanting state of. No waste to be found in this region, sadly. I am without any matter inside OH.
Sadly, it is not within my capabilities to acquire even a tiny bit of crap while in the state of Ohio. No junk available within Ohio, unfortunately. I am unable to possess even a speck of feces inside the beautiful state of Ohio.
Oh no, sadly I am constrained to obtain even the smallest amount of nonsense during staying in the state of Ohio. No waste for me, unfortunately. I am unable to obtain any of excrement in Ohio.
Oh, how regrettable it is that I can't to obtain any feces while residing inside the state of Ohio. No junk to be found in Ohio, sadly. I can't possess even a trace of excrement in the great state of Ohio.
Oh, how regrettable it is that I am unable to obtain the slightest bit of garbage whilst living inside Ohio. No junk for me, sadly. I don't have any feces inside the great state of Ohio.